Thursday, December 1, 2016

wah woke up at 730 today and quite an eventful day. eh my keyboard, the key with the exclamation mark and number one, doesn't work so I can't show my excitement anymore :(((((((( unless I google 'exclamation mark' then copy paste the punctuation hahahaha which is what I have been doing with the numerical one HAHA aiya see mood.

blog is dying sian i need more posts for future me to look back on. and current life has it such that everyday is so different and i wouldn't rmb what happened unless I write it down. But then lazy also lehhhhh ok i also need more pics here

Thursday, November 24, 2016


ohmannnnnnn i was all ready to sleep alr then this movie popped up in my suggested vids, so I just re-watched it and even one year later the feels are still so damn strong. Its prob gonna be stuck in my head for the next few days :((((

Doesn't help that i was searching for a message and our old convo came up :((((((((( 
"You are that person that I will never truly get over, even when I've convinced myself that I've moved on"

Friday, October 14, 2016

a stitch in time saves nine

so intensely overwhelming :(((((((((((

why everything happen at once, help............head is not right and heart is not right also omg is there even anything that is right

Monday, October 3, 2016

wonder where i will be for the next

first october was so unexpected yet again holyshit. damn good night lah thanks bruhs (esp my MVP HAHAH u da bomb omg). still trying to deal with the aftermath but well......what happened happened and theres no turning back oops . also 'bad decisions make for good memories' HOPE that is true for this case

thinking back to the previous 2 first octobers bring such conflicting feels and now i have one more to add to the collection wew

Sunday, September 25, 2016

hope u r having a better day than the one i just had

bad day tiring day omg feels super shit. and whats the point of this post lol maybe just congratulations on surviving the day.

Saturday, May 28, 2016

Finally some enlightenment wooowww i think i have decided.... 

'NO TURNING BACK' tbh best advice i have heard!! 

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

vroom vroom

just went for early morning driving lesson and wahhh the instructor so cool. I was telling him he rly looked like my friend (QK HAHA)  and I said my friend v handsome then he ask why nvr go for him hahahahah 'its complicated'.

Started raining towards the end of the lesson and i jokingly asked him to send me home and HE DID. omg nvr knew they provided this kind of service. And there was only a few mins left so he zoooooomed through the streets and broke so many traffic rules and honked at the slow cars HAHA but wow mad driving skills

Then before I got off the car he said in his 7 years of teaching I was the one he shared the most with  and that he was thankful to have been assigned to my lesson and THAT MADE MY DAY :)))

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

its sucks to be on this side of the fence. and to be constantly reminded of it :(((((((
"Idk where my happiness disappeared to. It just poofed"

coincidence. when everything comes crashing down AT ONCE. when all my failures are enlarged and highlighted and slapped in my face. Everything I thought I was, I sucked at being. Nowhere, and no one, to turn to.

gotta keep reminding myself: the grass is greener where you water it.

Sunday, May 1, 2016

What an utterly emotionally-draining day. Alot of pent-up unhappiness just threatening to spill over. You can either choose to work through this or gtfo now. Personally, i wish you wouldnt be a coward but ohhooo u have rly taught me the meaning of disappointment.

Monday, April 18, 2016

And it all boils down to luck??

So scared and lonely :( 

Friday, April 8, 2016

so close yet so far.

That feeling rlyrlyrly sucks :( ohwell i guess its just not meant to be :(((

To my 16-year-old self, im sorry. The letter you wrote to your future self, i.e. me right now, was the final push i needed. It gave me the courage and I have tried my best. But my best isnt enough. Im not good enough. Im sorry.  

Thursday, April 7, 2016

head vs heart

I told you to go, but my heart yearned for you to stay. I was afraid of what would happen if you had stayed, afraid of what I would say, afraid of how much it would affect both of us.

Don't let me hold you back.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

the incessant waves of nostalgia ohmannnn 

Is it simply human nature for us to be always reminiscing about the past, wishing we could somehow just go back in time? Sometimes i try to convince myself its due to this period of uncertainty. But life is always uncertain. At the back of my mind, I know there will come a time when I will be missing this period as well. Because thats just how life works. 

Yet, as much as I tell myself to live in the present, the memories are triggered so easily. And they are stacked like dominos, one leads to another to another and idk where it ends

Sunday, March 20, 2016

it scares me so much:

that im almost indifferent to something i used to believe i rlyrly wanted, that i may just well be setting myself up for failure, that im getting my hopes up just for them to be crushed.

 but then again, they say "If your dreams don't scare you, you need to dream a little bigger".

Sunday, March 6, 2016

Thank you parents, for the past 19 years.

Results day followed by birthday has called for an immense amount of reflection, but I can't translate my thoughts into words yet.

Thursday, March 3, 2016

Happiness is a choice

Freak havent seen 3am in a longlong while. Brain just keeps running and im rly tired and just thinking about how im gonna be feeling in the upcoming hours makes me even more tired. Dk what to do to get myself out of this. Been aimlessly scrolling through my phone and ended up here. 

Whatever happens, i will accept it and make the best out of it. 

Monday, February 15, 2016

There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship

"Why is it that we always fall for our best friend?
Is it because we know we can trust them?
Is it because we know them so well?
Is it because of the way they know exactly whats going on in our heads?
Or is it because they are there any day, anytime, anywhere, without the promise of kisses, intimate touches or whispered sentiments of love?
I think we love them because they are there when there is nothing in it for them except for that glimmer of hope that maybe someday there will be. "

Friday, February 12, 2016

maybe i can finally stop running from something and start running for something

so ytd my friend was talking about running a half-marathon, which got me thinking how nice it must be to have a goal to run towards. ever since i finished my last 2.4 last year i have stopped pushing myself during runs and it has been rlyrly nice to not have to race against the clock. but that also means everything has become rather stagnant: I run about the same distance at about the same speed.

ok guys i was gonna type a long post but i suddenly feel too lazy sooooo

BASICALLY i am inspired to start challenging myself again. like today after i finished one of my usual routes around the park i started on a second round (but about-turned after the first stretch of it HAHA) and maybe one day i can actually do 2 complete rounds?? that brings me one teeny step closer to a half-marathon bc that one will be like 4 rounds which is some intense shit hahahaha good luck man my friend if you are rly going for it (but if you do i will be no.1 supporter!)

Thursday, February 11, 2016

"Never take someone for granted. Hold every person close to your heart, because you might wake up one day and realise you've lost a diamond while you were too busy collecting stones. "

Sunday, January 17, 2016

long time no long post

had a momentary desire to delete this blog zzzz i was just scrolling around and everything seemed so jumbled and useless but then i didnt dare to cause i thought i might regret it in the future hahahah so 5 years worth of jumbled and useless stuff can just stay here

hmmmmm so on the day a levels ended we were at town area walking around and ended up at wheelock foodcourt at 10pm and i bumped into a senior there and we only talked for a few minutes but her advice really stuck and i just needed to write this down to remind myself not to forget her advice!!!

one week of routine and it almost feels like school again lol hahaha setting more than 10 morning alarms and still managing to sleep through all of them but everyone else in the house wakes up and  they will come wake me up hahahaha how am i gonna survive by myself next time

and 930pm is my exercise time! HAHA just cos tekong admin time v unpredictable so at least i can check my phone while doing something but wah ns life is so much different from what we all expected. still q excited to see how the boys (and girls) turn out hope they become hotter!! :)

getting back into regular jogging has been great srsly strongly recommended!!! if you are just looking to stay active, go at a steady pace and let your mind wander for 30mins and never everever forget music its VVVV IMPT

some nights im so tired i cant even keep myself awake to finish everything i wanted to but other nights im lying in bed at 3am trying to sleep so idek whats happening. omgggg and last night i had a HORRIBLE toothache :((((( kept me awake for hours just lying there in pain. tried to find something to do to distract myself hahahaha HERE
and the dentist is fully booked til two days later omg srsly........surviving on ice cubes and painkillers for now and my parents were just like 'welcome to adulthood' walaooooooooo

ok also damn annoyed why the heck do u keep talking about me when im standing right there just to purposely piss me off like whatthefuck srsly??????? hate it so much omg. and i really think sometimes we truly do hate each other. which is a scary thought but i dont see any other explanation